Briana

=Welcome To my wiki page =

04/10/10

A deep, raw rumble, a rusty, throaty roar, getting louder. . . Coming closer.

09/07/10

Why do our parents have to be so horrible and cruel? I don't even like plants! but still i have to go to the plant nursery with them. B-o-r-i-n-g. James and I had to give up fighting. So here we are in the car staring blankly out the window. "Were here, "Said mum excitedly. When you use speech and you are going to follow the dialogue with said mum (exclaimed grandad etc) you put a comma at the end of the dialogue but before the closing speech mark. It is good to see you are using dialogue (speech) in your writing :) Miss Paterson .done "YAY, <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">" i replied Sarcastically. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">this place is weird.Adults shopping happily for PLANTS and bored children. Mum And dad went straight away to the pittasporams .All I could see were plants for miles.There must be a thousand plants in here!

<span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">James and i went away to do some exploring of our own. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">"James" I said "look at this strange looking door behind all these grape vines. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">wow James replied it looks so old and rusty. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">Lets go in I suggested. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">I don't think that's a good idea replied James. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">your just a wimp ,come on we only live once, whats the worst that could happen?''I said.

<span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">the door quietly creaked as I opened it.I looked left, I looked right there was nothing there .I looked up still nothing so i looked down and there was a old crooked wooden staircase with some planks missing. The stairs creaked as i tip toed down them. James shivered as an eerie breeze drifted up the stairs. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 20px; line-height: 29px;">This is so SCARY!James trembled. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 20px; line-height: 29px;">Don't be drastic James it's not scary,i replied disbelievingly. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 20px; line-height: 29px;">"I feel all tingly," said James, "as if I'm getting smaller." <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 20px; line-height: 29px;">AHHHH we're shrinking! I cried in terror.

<span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 20px; line-height: 29px;">"Jessie!" James squeaked with a look of terror on his face. <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 20px; line-height: 29px;">"Yeah?" I asked as scared as James looked.

<span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">To Be Continued

//<span style="color: #ff0031; font-family: 'Courier New',Courier,monospace;">Good start to your story. I like the use of a question as a starter and how you have exaggerated the word boring by separating the letters with hyphens. Just a couple of things to think about: // //<span style="color: #ff0031; font-family: 'Courier New',Courier,monospace;">1. Try putting your speech on lines of their own to make it easier for your reader to keep up with the dialogue.Done // //<span style="color: #ff0031; font-family: 'Courier New',Courier,monospace;">2. Also can you please put your new work at the top of the page so that your readers sees the new work straight away and have to scroll down to see the older posts. // //<span style="color: #ff0031; font-family: 'Courier New',Courier,monospace;">Miss Paterson :)Done //

// Awesome work Bree, its really good I'm so proud (: keep up the great work - Taay (: xo // // I have one simply thing to say about this story... WICKED!!!!-Eily R (: xx //

<span style="color: #006dff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">20/06/10 <span style="color: #bf00ff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 170%;">My Cloud Poem

<span style="color: #006dff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">Clouds of every size <span style="color: #006dff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">Clouds of every shape <span style="color: #006dff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">Clouds of every weight, <span style="color: #006dff; font-family: Impact,Charcoal,sans-serif; font-size: 150%;">Clouds of every make.

//<span style="color: #ff0000; font-family: Verdana,Geneva,sans-serif;">It is great to see you have made a start on your page! Good on you. Miss Paterson //